Patrick Swayze's Wido will Talk about Loving--and Losing

Patrick Swayze's Wido will Talk about Loving--and Losing

As much as Patrick Swayze's death hurt his fans, the pain was infinitely worse for Lisa Niemi, his wife of 34 years.

"I am so grateful for what I had and my connection to him, and part of me believes that I will see him again, and I'm just going to have to go on until then," said the actor's widow Tuesday during the "Grief, Healing and Resilience" talk at Women's Conference 2009 in Long Beach.

The roundtable discussion took place in front of about 14,000 people and was moderated by California first lady Maria Shriver. Kelly Preston had originally been scheduled to take part, but she later canceled, saying it was too soon to discuss her son Jett's death in January.

Recalling how she told Swayze she loved him over and over in the weeks before his death, Niemi said that she still worried it wasn't enough.

"I've spent two thirds of my life with him," she said. "My regret is that I didn't tell him that I loved him enough over that entire 34 years."

Niemi helped Swayze pen the memoir The Time of My Life during those final months. The couple didn't have any children but counted the horses and dogs on their New Mexico ranch among the closest members of their family.

Loss is like "an animal all its own," Niemi said today.

"When the grief takes you, it's like your body is not your own. I'm just going with the flow. I know I have to go through it."

Patrick Swayze's widow, Lisa Niemi, will talk about loving -- and losing -- her Hollywood star husband in a live interview with talk show host Oprah Winfery due to be aired on Friday.

Winfrey's website, www.oprah.com, said "The Oprah Winfrey Show" interview with Niemi, Swayze's wife of 34 years, was her first one-on-one since her husband died in September following a 20-month battle with pancreatic cancer.

The Women's Conference 2009, hosted by Shriver and Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, gathers more than 100 newsmakers and world opinion leaders with 25,000 women from all walks of life for to be "educated, inspired and empowered to be Architects of Change in their own lives, within their communities and around the world."